Difference

Difference jokes

Grass

What’s the difference between me and grass? Grass doesn’t cut itself.

Delta

What did Omnicron say to Delta?

"Same race, bud, different evolution."

"SIX FEET AWAY, OMNI! SIX FEET AWAY!"

Submarine

What is the difference between Madeleine McCann and a submarine?

They are both full of seamen and are at the bottom of the ocean.

Wife

What's the difference between my wife and her sisters?

Her sisters ate hotter, and I married the grenade.

Twin Towers

What’s the difference between my mom and the Twin Towers?

My mom got hit by two cars. The Twin Towers got hit by two planes.

Elephant

What is bigger than an elephant but smaller than two elephants?

A different sized elephant.

Jesus

What's the difference between Jesus and Christmas tree lights?

They can both flash.

Orphan

What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan? The apples get picked! 🤪

Mosquito

What's the difference between your mom and a mosquito?

Answer: The mosquito stops sucking if you slap hard enough.

Toilet

Q. What's the difference between people and a toilet?

A. Neither does R. Kelly.

Animal

What the difference between cats and dogs? They dont have one both taste good

Baby

What’s the difference between a 5.7l v8 and a dead baby?

If you lift the hood on my car, you won’t find a 5.7l v8.

Family

What's the difference between a happy family and a car guy? Only one has a family.

Guy

Why do guys hold their ball sack when they run?

Because they don't have titties.

Death

What's the difference between Madlen Makan and Stephen Hawking?

Nothing, they're both dead.

Text

BREAKING NEWS

All the desert regions in the world are now considered lush rainforests. They house many different species of life and have significantly helped with the constant carbon dioxide emissions.

The reason why is because... Your texts are so dry.

Calorie

What’s the difference between a baby and a baked potato?

About 140 calories.

Fetus

What’s the difference between a fetus and a jar of pickles?

The pickles aren’t as tasty in a jar.

Midget

What's the difference between a midget and a tall person? Only one of them can ride the rides.