Degree jokes
Why doesn't the Sun go to college? Because it has a million degrees.
What's worse than having an honorary degree from Harvard? Being homeless and having an honorary degree from Harvard.
So this guy is talking to his buddy about his flying lessons. "My first time in the air, my instructor informed me that he was an 8th degree black belt and homosexual, and if I don't succumb to his sexual advances I would have to jump out of the plane," and his buddy says, "Well, did you jump?" The guy says, "Yeah, a little at first."
We can only see 90 degrees.
I got in an argument with the 90-degree angle. And guess what? It was right!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a bucket of water.
WHERE DO THEY REALLY GO BECAUSE WATER CAN NOT BE AT THE TOP OF A HILL!?. I honestly think that only people with a physics degree can make nursery rhythms.
Why did the rapper go to school?
To get his degree in FLOW-NOMICS.
Why did the glacier send the iceberg to college?
Because, in order for ice to exist, it must retain a temperature of less than... ZERO DEGREES at the atomic level!
It's a very smart day today. I'd say it has about 30-45 degrees, with humidex.
Why are mountains so smart?
'Cause they have a degree.
If your house is cold, just stand in the corner. It's always 90 degrees there.
If you measured your hairline with a protractor, it would show 90 degrees.
Why was an oven so smart?
It had 70 degrees.
So what is the difference between a real doctor and a doctor of philosophy?
One cures the sick and the other makes them sick!
The doctor told me my temperature was exactly 98.6 degrees. I felt relieved until he said, “Celsius.”
Did you hear about the volcano that was accepted into Cambridge?
It was a decision on the number of degrees it holds, which is a lot, because volcanoes have lava if they're active. And ours was.
How many degreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees does Billy Corgan have?
1979.
What do you call a rapper with a PhD?
A rap scholar.
Why was the slave so happy? Because he got his master's degree.
Where did Milky Way get its degree?
At the university.