Day Jokes

my mom said take out the trash and i said okay. the next day she asked "where is your sister", and i said in line to get crushed.

The other day, my wife asked me to pass her lipstick but I accidentally passed her a glue stick. She still isn't talking to me.

A teacher says to her class one day, "Whoever answers my next question, can go home." A boy throws his bag out the window.

The teacher asks, "Who just threw that?"

The boy says, "Me! I'm going home now."

people call me a bad person but just the other day i saw a little kid crying and asked him where were his parents , i love working at the orphanage

Get shanked with a lamb shank with a stinky pampa in the tolpan.

My sisters name is coco and one day she was funny so I told her you

Coconut

Jokes are like food, not everyone has it

there was a man he took a right he took another right he took a last right why did he stop

Today is the day of 9/11 and we were in class making jokes and somebody said that’s sad and I was like why and they said “ today is the day the towers went down” and I said just like I did on you mum last night

What kind of clothing should you wear on “ hump day”? Camelflouge.

The other day my friend messaged by saying “bro I have two pieces of bad news for you.” I told him to combine them. He replied with “your girlfriend is cheating on both of us.”

Hi how are you busy doing right I just text me and my dad was going

Three people die on the same day: a German, an American, and an Italian. They all go to Hell for various reasons. American: I won't ever see my dog again! Italian: I won't ever make pizzas again! German: Hey, granddad, how have you been?

What is a difference between a human and human rights and a tree tree and a house that has to

I did have a good night and I did a good night and I had to walk around the house 🏡

if you ever get bored tell an orphan to take two days off their calendar if they ask why say because your missing fathers day and mother’s day

if your ever down one day just go to the orphanage and bully a orphan because what is he going to do about it he has no parents.

One day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa smoking his cigarettes. Little Johnny asked, "Grandpa, can I smoke some of your cigarettes?" His grandpa replied, "Can your penis reach your asshole?" "No", said Little Johnny. His grandpa replied, "Then you're not old enough." The next day, Little Johnny saw his grandpa drinking beer. He asked, "Grandpa, can I drink some of your beer?" His grandpa replied, "Can your penis reach your asshole?" "No" said Little Johhny. "Then you're not old enough." his grandpa replied. The next day, Little Johnny was eating cookies. His grandpa asked, "Can I have some of your cookies?" Little Johnny replied, "Can your penis reach your asshole?" His grandpa replied, "It most certainly can!" Little Johnny replied, "Then go fuck yourself