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Cremation, The last chance for a smoking hot body.

Damn girl, are you a smoke detector? Because you’re super annoying and won’t shut up.

what do you call a retard smoking weed? a baked potato

What do you call someone with Down Syndrome who smokes weed?

A baked potato.

What do you do when your daughter starts smoking?

Slow down and use lube.

what do you call a burning church?

Holy Smokes

What do you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?

Stop and apply lubrication.

A kid is arrested for a school shooting threat he is then apprehended and asked why he wanted to do this. He responds with “what do you mean I already did it” then the police ran back to the school to aprehend the other people he was planing it with the cops busted in through the doors which caused a smoke trap to go off which then the cops saw three people walk in and the police begin to fire. But as the smoke began to clear the cops saw that the three people were 16 kids duck taped to rolling poles 4 per pole. Back to the station holding the kid being apprehended. the kid puts his feet up on a chair and said “Aww it pays to be lazy!”

There is a young man smoking and a woman in a wheelchair. The woman says “why is a young man like you smoking?”. The man turns around and says “why the f... are you wearing trainers…”

Why did the guy get the hose

Because the girl was smoking hot

He: “Do you smoke after sex?”

She: “I don’t know. I’ve never looked.”

What kind of cigarettes does a hippie smoke? Yours.

What a duck’s favorite thing to smoke?


After a lord comes back from vacation, he meets the gardener at the gates of his park. Lord: Has something happened while I was gone? Gardener: Ah, nothing much, I just broke a shovel while I was burrying your dog. Lord: My dog died?! Gardener: Yes, it choked on the smoke when your mansion burnt down. Lord: My mansion?! How?! Gardener: Well, your wife was distraught and dropped a candle on the curtains. Lord: Why was she so distraught? Gardener: She received the news of your daughter being kidnapped. Lord: My daughter! Don’t you have any positive news for me?! Gardener: Oh right! Your cancer test results!

What do you call a fish that smokes? “A puffer.”

I asked my girlfriend if she was a smoke alarm she said “ is it because I warned him when hottness came” I said “ no, you don’t shut up

what do you call 1 normal kid,and 2 retarded kids,smoking weed? pot roast.

Johnny Johnny? Yes pa pa Eating Sugar? Yes pa pa, I am eating sugar because it is the only thing i can reach and you have refused to feed me for the past 3 days. You smoke 2 packs of cigs a day and you’re mad at me for eating a little sugar. Smoking? Telling lies? Yes pa pa, you do all of those things because you’re a chronic addict.

what did the big chimney say to the little chimney “ your to young to smoke”

What do you call a downie that smokes weed? A baked patato