Dark Humor
Spend all night in a dark humor webpage.
Go to an orphanage today and read it to them.
And I'm sure if you go to a school for disabled children, they should understand it.
What’s the difference between a dad and a boulder?
About 15 stone.
What’s long and black?
The line at KFC.
Crying babies are like parties. No matter how many times you try to end it, it keeps going.
What’s black and sits on top of the stairs?
Christopher Reeves in a house fire.
What’s bin Laden got in common with SpongeBob?
Both can be found at the bottom of the sea, and they’re filled with holes.
I asked, "Mom, what's that in the sky?"
Mom replied with, "That's your father."
It’s important to establish a good vocabulary.
If I had known the difference between the words “antidote” and “anecdote,” one of my best friends would still be alive.
I ate a baby, it tasted like baby.
I hate double standards.
Burn a body at a crematorium, you’re “being a respectful friend.” Do it at home and you’re “destroying evidence.”
Me: Hey! Do you know how to tie a knot?
Person: Yea, why?
Me: Cause I need help tying this noose :)
What's common between a feminist and a knife?
They both stay in the kitchen.
What do you call an emo dating another emo?
The suicide duo.
What's the difference between a dead baby and a slice of pizza?
A dead baby can't feed a family.
What's it called when a Black person makes a joke? A joke, you racist.
JK, dark humor.
Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
Because they taste funny.
The other day I commented a dark humor joke on a post about a guy who lost his best friend. The joke was “I was so drunk last night I threw a mushroom at a midget and said ‘grow mario grow.’” He commented “What the hell is wrong with you?” and I said “IKR I really gotta work on my alcoholic issues.”
He then replied “This is a post about my dead best friend get the fuck off my feed I don’t even know you.” And so I said “Well then get to know me, I could become your new best friend!”
What is black and blue and really hates sex?
The six-year-old in my basement.
Friend: How dark is your humor?
Me: .....it...
Friend: No
Me: *smiles* GETS BEAT BY THE MISTRESS AND GETS SCOLDED BY THE MASTER!!!
Friend: Why are you like this?
Damn! Really stole my friend's glasses. Well, now they're blind, but not really, they're dead.