What do you call an emo dating another emo?
The suicide duo.
What's the difference between a dead baby and a slice of pizza?
A dead baby can't feed a family.
What's it called when a Black person makes a joke? A joke, you racist.
JK, dark humor.
Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
Because they taste funny.
The other day I commented a dark humor joke on a post about a guy who lost his best friend. The joke was “I was so drunk last night I threw a mushroom at a midget and said ‘grow mario grow.’” He commented “What the hell is wrong with you?” and I said “IKR I really gotta work on my alcoholic issues.”
He then replied “This is a post about my dead best friend get the fuck off my feed I don’t even know you.” And so I said “Well then get to know me, I could become your new best friend!”
What is black and blue and really hates sex?
The six-year-old in my basement.
Friend: How dark is your humor?
Me: .....it...
Friend: No
Me: *smiles* GETS BEAT BY THE MISTRESS AND GETS SCOLDED BY THE MASTER!!!
Friend: Why are you like this?
Damn! Really stole my friend's glasses. Well, now they're blind, but not really, they're dead.
I had to stop drinking because I got tired of waking up in my car, driving 90.
My mate caught me sniffing his disabled sister's knickers the other day. It wouldn't have been so bad, but she was wearing them at the time. It made the rest of the funeral so awkward.
What can't you say to an emo?
Hang in there, buddy!
Orphans and Chinese people can’t play baseball. The orphans can’t find home, and the Chinese kid will eat the bat.
Q: How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch?
A: You give them a Sandy Hook.
Rope: Hey buddy! Want to hang?
Me: Maybe I can hang later...
Cock: Can I have attention from your Dad now?
Dark humor is like a kid with cancer.
It never gets old.
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
Want to know something? Jason and Michael Myers had to watch their family while they have to live forever. That's why they kill; they're trying to make people experience what they did.
"Hitler and Goring are standing atop the Berlin radio tower. Hitler says he wants to do something to put a smile on Berliners' faces.
So Goring says: 'Why don't you jump?'"
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally.
What is the difference between a feminist and a knife?
A knife at least has a point.
