Dad jokes
Rodd Flanders: What's "gay" mean?
Bart: Uh, it means you used to be afraid, but now you're not.
Rodd says to his dad Ned: I'm gay, Daddy.
POV: Your dad is gone.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not your dad. LMAO.
Dad, I love you.
Son, I love you.
Dad: I'll pay you 10 bucks for every day you don't tell a lie.
Next day:
Dad: Son, what's the ugliest thing you've ever seen?
Son: That ugly face of yours, go get a life, gosh, Dad, you're embarrassing.
The dad sulked for 3 whole years.
Proof that words really can hurt.
My dad seen RuPaul's Drag Race?
Asked when will they do up the cars!
Hollow Knight Meme
You are like a thunderstorm; when you go away, like your dad, everyone is happy.
Kid at Wish: I wish I could be Batman.
Doctor: Okay, shoots mum and dad. Doctor: I guess now you’ll have to be gay, you wanted to be like Batman.
What's the difference between when I opened the window in a car wash and when Kawhi Leonard did it? At least my dad didn't get shot in the eye.
What’s the difference between a dad and a boomer age?
Ur dad
Omg, I'm sooooo sry!!!!!
What do you get when you cross a pig with a cactus? A porkupine!
Did your dad ever tell you he was going to get milk... But then never came back lol? 😅
Dad: Are you gay?
Kid: Yes.
10 days later.
Kid: I’m going to my girlfriend's house.
Dad: I thought you were gay?
Kid: What’s wrong with you? He’s the girly girl of our relationship, dumba**.
Dad: Don’t swear and okay, bud.
My friend asked me why I haven’t had milk in six years.
I told him my dad never came back with it.
What's the difference between you and your sister?
Your dad.
Me: *finds out my dad's an orphan*
No one:
Literally no one:
Me: Time to make his life hell.😈
Speak to your dad before I put my hand up your ass!
Dad: Honey!
Mom: What?
Dad: All of the broken condoms are on the bed.
Mom: WHAT!?
Children: *staring*
Luca’s Mom and Dad be throwing the kids into the fountain in the city, but they're sea monsters, so if they went to jail for that, they would be on death row anyway. 🤣
I have a friend who doesn't have a dad.
He says: "You're useless, go to hell!"
Me: "Wait, why do you want me to join your dad?"