I arrived at work and saw a kid crying. I walked up to the kid and asked, "Hey, where are your parents?" and the kid just cried more. God, I love working at an orphanage.
*Watches sad movie with family*
Everyone else: *Crying*
Sister: How aren't you crying?
Me: I have no tears left to cry...
I want to die in my sleep, like grandpa did, not screaming and crying like the people on the bus he drove.
I helped my son (who is missing his arms) unwrap his Christmas present. The ungrateful bastard just sits there and cries, and it's a pair of mittens. The ungrateful bastard is just sitting there, crying.
The most powerful thing in the world is babies. This is because they cry and get what every they want.
Why do orphans cry at insurance places?
They got offered the family plan.
Yo momma is so ugly, she made my Happy Meal cry.
There was a little kid crying in the park today. I asked him where his parents were. Now I realize, man, I love my job.
Can anyone answer this riddle? Apparently this is the world's hardest riddle! Good luck 😝
“I turn polar bears white, and I will make you cry. I make guys have to pee, and girls comb their hair. I make celebrities look stupid, and normal people look like celebrities.”
My sis told me that onions are the only food that can make you cry...
So I threw a coconut at her.
(some kid crying because hes an orphan and kids are bulling him) teacher:HEY i was a orphan to so if you bully him your basicly trying to bully me too me:OOF teacher:now is somebody not here? me:your parents
"911, what’s your emergency?" I asked, listening to the quiet sobs of a little kid on the other end of the line.
“I think my daddy want to kill me,” the girl said and cried, making me freeze on the spot as I recognized my daughter’s voice.
Jimmy does stand up comedy. He says, "What do you call an orangutan?"
Jake replies, "YOU!" Then everyone, including the teacher, laughs. Jimmy cries.
LOL
Your kid is so annoying, he makes his Happy Meal cry.
What does a priest and a clown have in common?
They both make children cry.
Q: How do you make a door cry?
A: Twist its knob.
Don’t cry when you attend my funeral, I was dead long ago so why cry now?
A man sees a crying woman by a pond. She is in a wheelchair and has no arms or legs.
He asks her why she is crying, and she answers that she has never been hugged. Feeling pity, he hugs her, then jogs away.
The next day, he finds her crying again, and she says she has never been kissed. The man kisses her and jogs away again.
On the third day, the man sees her crying and asks her thrice. She tells him she has never been fucked. The man picks her up and throws her in the pond, telling her, "You're fucked now!"
Roses are dead. violets are dying. Outside I'm smiling. Inside I'm crying.
Why do I go around making orphan jokes? Because they can't go crying to their parents. 😅
