Since it started raining, all my wife has done is look sadly through the stupid window...
If it gets any worse, I'll have to let her in.
A penis has a sad life. His hair is a mess. His family is nuts. His neighbor is an asshole. His best friend is a pussy. And his owner beats him.
Teacher: Describe a penguin
Student: Black, White, Beak
Teacher: Good, now describe an orphan
Student: Sad, maybe depressed, No family
Teacher: Amazing, now describe a cow
Student: Brown bun hair, red shirt, white skirt, pantyhose, and dollar tree shoes
Teacher: No! How does that describe a cow?
Student: It describes you tho.
what do you call a dog with no legs?
It don't matter what you call it. It ain't coming.
I have many jokes about unemployed people, sadly none of them work.
The average human male walks for five miles, but the gas station is ten miles away. So why does it take fifteen years for my dad to buy cigarettes?
Why did the chicken go to KFC... to visit his family
Today is sad my sister got hit by a car and I lost my license as a driver
Today my EX got trampled by a bunch of horse and sadly I lost my job as a horse trainer.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was emotionally distressed after a break up and wanted to find some help at his friends pen, in the end he was run over by a car, marking a sad end to what might have been a good chickens life
It’s sad because with all these mean jokes Stephen hawkings can’t even Stand up for himself
A doctor walks up to a dying man and sadly says: "I'm sorry, the test shows you only have 10 more to live." The man says " 10!? 10 what!? Years? Weeks? Days? What?!!?" The doctor calmly replies "Nine"
Why did the toilet paper not make across the road
Because it got stuck in the crack
you
What does a rock and a girl have in common? The flat ones get skipped
My mom wanted me to build her a shed for her useless things then she told me to go live in it
What's the difference between humans and trash cans? One's actually useful
Today is the day of 9/11 and we were in class making jokes and somebody said that’s sad and I was like why and they said “ today is the day the towers went down” and I said just like I did on you mum last night
One day, in the Serengeti, a zebra started wondering if he was a white horse with black stripes, or a black horse with white stripes. So he goes around asking all the animals. He never gets his answer. One fateful day, he dies and goes to Heaven. In Heaven, the zebra gets an idea. ¨I will go ask God!¨ So, he asks God, and God chuckles. ¨You are what you are!¨ The zebra gets sad. He walks around and his dead zebra friend shows up. He asks, ¨What is wrong?¨ The zebra answers, ¨Well, I asked God if I was either a white horse with black stripes, or a black horse with white stripes. He just replied ´You are what you are!´¨ His friend says, ¨Oh! You are a white horse with black stripes! Why? Because he would have said ´You is what you is!´
if you ask an artist how to commit suicide, they will say a very creative way
