Crime jokes
What’s the difference a hooker an a drug dealer...?? A hooker can wash her crack an resell it.
How do inmates keep in touch?
They have cell phones.
One day an old woman came into the bank and asked me to check her balance... So, I pushed her over.
Q. How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A. Gotta be more than 9 'cause my basement is still dark.
Michael Vick is coming to town, hide your dogs!
Memes
Last night I remember partying with friends to find blood on my nightstand.
Moments after, I scolded my friends to put my alarm clock back where they found it.
Why is it inappropriate when guys say their girlfriends are their “Partners in Crime”?
Like we get it, bro, she’s underage.
The police officer in London, who used fake Covid rules to arrest a young woman, drive her more than 50 miles out of London in a hire car, murder her, and do whatever to her, has appealed against his Whole Life tariff.
He should be relieved it was only that! Could've been worse... could've married her!
What's the quickest way to get to the hospital? Just stand in the middle of a busy road.
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.
What do you do after raping a deaf person? Cut their fingers off so they don't tell anyone.
MORE JOKES COMING SOON LMAO ;]
My friend, Jackson Huge-T, got raped by Huge-D's.
I got raped when I was 5 in my princess pajamas by my dad. Nobody laughed at these jokes; they just cried.
7 little children gathered around the bed Bill Cosby's fantasy.
All he wants to do is tickle the kids, it's as plain as can be.
7 cellmates gathered around the bed ready to rape Bill Cosby instead.
Why do pedophiles never cum first?
Because they like to cum in a little behind.
What are a pedophile"s shoes called?
Answer: WHITE VANS
What did the frog say to the pedophile?
Why did your mum touch me? Because she was a pedo.
Rape is not funny!! What if you were the girl/boy getting raped?
How many rapists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Punchline: One, but they prefer soda bottles instead.
What’s the difference between Juice WRLD and George Floyd?
Nothing, they both can’t breathe.
What do rapists like to suck?
The life out of their victim.