Crime jokes
A man broke into Stevie Wonder's house and threatened to kill his wife.
He just turned a blind eye.
Why did the woman get raped in the ass?
She assed for it.
The moment when you tell an illegal immigrant to go home and he walks to the jail cell and closes it.
Brian was shopping at a mall. He hopped onto an escalator. Next to him were two people having an argument. Eventually, one of them pulled out a pocket knife threatening to stab the other. Brian murmured "Well, that escalated quickly..."
Why did the guitar teacher get arrested?
He fingered a minor.
Memes
tell Bruce get over it
Donald Trump is to white Americans as O.J. Simpson is to black Americans. They will never choose to convict these people even if they murdered or raped.
How many times can 46 go into 8? Just hop in the van and find out.
One day an old woman came into the bank and asked me to check her balance... So, I pushed her over.
Roses are red, Kevin Spacey is gay,
If you'd stayed with your parents, I wouldn't have taken you away.
It's not a war crime if no one's alive to report it.
It's not a hate crime if you don't hate the person.
Diddy and Hawk Tuah walk into a bar. Hawk Tuah says, "Spit on that thang!" Only one walks out. 💀
A rapist, pedophile, and a priest walk into a bar.
He orders a beer.
Why couldn’t the booty stay calm?
Because it was on crack.
Damn! Really stole my friend's glasses. Well, now they're blind, but not really, they're dead.
Why is 4/20 such an epic date?
Because it's weed day, Columbine, AND Hitler's birthday;)
My friend told me to beat that pussy up... so why is the local animal control at my door?
You look like Megamind, drug dealer.
I killed a homeless dude, now he's at funeral home 😭💔
Your soul is black. I have 4 guns, little kid. Get in the van before I shoot you!