Chuck Norris jokes

Chuck Norris didn't join the army, the army joined Chuck Norris.

When Chuck Norris was asked, "Do you know the way?" he replied, "I am the way!"

Chuck Norris once stepped on a Lego.

The Lego broke in half.

They say Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer, too bad he doesn't cry.

Chuck Norris destroys the yo mama!

I have fun going on them roller coasters that go really high up and sitting by random people, and once we get to the high point, I look at the stranger and go "wham" and unplug their seat belt.

Chuck Norris lit a campfire, and humans saw the sun for the first time.

Chuck Norris and Superman had a bet. The loser had to wear their underwear on their pants.

Once upon a time... Chuck Norris stepped on a Lego. R.I.P. the Lego piece.

One time Chuck Norris peed in the gas tank of a semi truck as a practical joke. That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.

Chuck Norris sleeps with the light on, not because he is afraid of the darkness, but because the darkness is afraid of him.

The Titanic was going through the ocean. Chuck Norris was on the ship, and they never crashed into an iceberg. He just shat off the front of the ship!

Before the chicken or the egg, there was only Chuck Norris.

Jesus could walk on water, and Chuck Norris can swim through land.

Chuck Norris can make 5 minute frosting in 4 minutes.

Chuck Norris doesn't turn on his shower, he just stares at it until it cries.

There once was a street named Chuck Norris. They had to change the name because no one crosses Chuck Norris and lives.

Chuck Norris has a bear rug in his living room. It's not dead or anything, it's just too scared to move.

Death once had a near Chuck Norris experience...

Chuck Norris has been to Mars... that's why there are no signs of life there.