Can jokes
What is the difference between a tall kid and an orphan? One is tall enough that their parents can see them.
Yo head so big I can skate on yo head.
I'm talking bout real real big, set a plate on yo head, charge a phone on yo head, build a home on yo head, studio wide, write a song on yo head.
Hi, people. I really need a friend. Can someone please be my friend? Say in comments if you will.
What question can you never answer yes to?
Answer: Are you asleep yet?
What can you break, even if you never pick it up or touch it?
Answer: A promise.
Memes
What has to be broken before you can use it?
Answer: An egg.
I just bought a book about lamps...
So I can do some light reading over the weekend.
I feel weird to ask this, but can anyone guess my real name?
#Imbored
Me: Mrs., can I read my book?
Teacher: Sure.
Me: *watching my Chromebook*
Why can you not let an orphan touch an iPhone 7? Because it would break if they touched the home button.
I am sooooooo bored, Gwen, can you please get on, or anybody, since I'm weirdly obsessed with Gwen.
Can you be my daddy? 🍌😘😉
Hey, can I tell you a joke about pencils? Never mind, it's pointless.
As you can see here, Jessie is wearing a lot of concealer.
Jessie?
I can change a "t" into a "p," just drink it and wait a few hours.
"Soph, can we talk?"
Prince, can we please chat now? Pls, pls! Love you!
I just wanted to say whoever is a faker pretending to be me, that you are literally ruining my life right now. And I can literally not take this right now in life and that I just want peace so please, please stop.
Hey Gwen come on let's chat! We can forget about that dumb bitch "prince" and focus on us!
What's the Fastest 20000 Meter Dash a Human Can Run?