Can jokes

Hey Gwen, can we please chat? I am really bored! Love you! 😘😘😘😘😘

Gwen, can we please chat? 😊

I just got off the phone with Kristen Stewart yesterday. She said I was invited to her cookout this Friday. I said I'll come by and bring some drinks, like wine, beer, and liquor, so we can get our freak on all night and drink some cherry wine until daybreak ends.

Kid: I want to be like Batman.

Genie: I can make arrangements. The kid comes home, both of his parents are dead.

Genie: I told you.

Kid: .............................................

You’re so short, you can swing your legs when you sit on a stool.

Hey guys, starting tomorrow, I will put one letter of the "doin your mom" song every day. Can I finish the song?

Also, I might be in Fortnite, hehehehehe.

How can you find out how old a cabbage is?

By looking at its cabbAGE.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Please.

Please who?

Police, can you stop talking so we can get to the end of the joke.

Lol.

My father can take a joke because he made one.

Hey babe, I’m looking to get 23 years in 23 seconds, can you help?

Can you see me?

How can you make a orphans hand bleed?

Real them to clap until there parent come home.

When you're mad, you might as well just punch an orphan because what can they do, tell their parents?

A magician is driving, but then he "turns" into a driveway.

If you get this joke, you have no personality at all. Send all the help you can get:).

Q: Why do men say "ladies first?"

A: So they can look at their a**.

Pigeons can be annoying at times, especially when their bones get stuck in-between your teeth.

What do you call roller skates you can walk in?

"Wock n' roll."

Is your middle name Fancy Feast?

'Cause your face looks like a can of dog food.

What do you call a fish that can use a katana?

A salmon-rai.

Joe Rogan to Christopher Doemges: "What can you tell me about musicians of the 18th century?" Doemges: "They're all dead already!"