Call jokes
What do you call a singer who can't make a song?
Taylor Swift.
What do you call a person with nobody and no nose?
When you were late to school and your teacher called you tardy, she meant that in more ways than one.
What does a stuttering Santa call Mrs. Claus?
A hoe hoe hoe.
What do you call it when the Edmonton Oilers play against the Nashville Predators? A Diddy Bowl.
What do you call a cold Explain bear?
A brrr.
What do you call a pig in a blanket?
My wife on a cold day.
What do you call a fat, lazy person who smokes weed? A baked potato.
You know what they call pineapples in Paris?
I don't know, what?
Anus.
What do you call a Muslim who drinks, smokes, and fools around with other women?
Turkish.
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
Someone prank calls a general. The general hangs up and goes, "Kids these days have no respect for their elders. That's why I send them all to die."
What does a furry call a sexy furry?
A foxy lady!
I called my guy friend a cock-sucker the other day. He replied with, "Hey, 20 bucks is 20 bucks."
This is how animals were named.
"Bye Son." *cuts call*. What are we talking about?
"Bison. Perfect."
I was lying on the living room carpet the other day with my girlfriend on top of me in wings and a tutu, making out.
I called her the Fallen Angel.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to garden?
Lil Plant
What do you call a rapper who LOVES math?
2Pac-square
What do you call a rapper who's also a magician?
Eminem-o the Great.
What do you call a rapper who's ALWAYS on time?
Punctual P