Santa decided coal was too expensive, so he started putting shredded lettuce and mayo in naughty kid's lockers... he calls it the coal's law.
What do you call a black person?
Dark humor.
My principal called my mom at school and said, "You should teach your son well." After coming back home, at first she taught me sex!
What do you call a coffee without water? Africano.
What do you call a Portuguese who commits a crime in Las Vegas?
Consensual Rapper 7.
What do you call a camel stranded in the desert of Arabia?
A Shawarmano Cameldo!
What do you call someone in a wheelchair during a California fire?
A steamed vegetable.
What do you call a movie at Bill Cosby’s house?
Netflix and pill.
Hannes asks his mother, "Mom, why are the peanuts called peanuts?" Mom replies, "Because they grow in the earth." Hannes replies, "Then why don't strawberries grow in the earth?" Mom replies: "The giraffes originally had a short neck, but it has grown from giraffe to giraffe. The same thing happened with the strawberries. They grew in the earth and grew higher from harvest to harvest until at some point their stems protruded from the earth." Hannes replies, "Then why is my neck so short?" The mother replies: "So many people died in the First and Second World Wars that our necks could not develop at all. It was the same in the Thirty Years' War. We humans have been in so many wars. The giraffes in none and that's why our neck is so short."
What do you call a German that can not see?
A Not-see.
For centuries the Catholic Church censored everything that wouldn‘t fit with their teachings. You know what I call that?
"Chancel culture!"
What do you call a bus full of transgender men? T-Mobile.
I'm starting a new charity where homosexuals help the extremely handicapped.
I'm calling it "Fruits and Vegetables".
What do you call a deaf and blind axe murderer?
Helen Killer.
Name: Jack call sign "triple" School: Nova corps gun academy location: Wyoming mountains
If a mentally challenged person shows up late
Is it ok to call him tardy?
What do you call two female lovers spying on the government?
Lesbionage.
What do you call a nun on a wheelchair?
Virgin Mobile.
Calling you an idiot would be an insult to stupid people. You're much worse than that.
A German priest went to America for a few months. Unfortunately for him, he did not speak the best English. He stayed with a beautiful, young single woman who worked at a nearby orphanage.
Every day, he visited her in the orphanage, and he always brought her small gifts, and of course to the young children.
The young woman thought the priest was flirting with him, and she knew he was not married. She left that thought in the back of her mind for a few weeks.
A few weeks later, she finally brought up her nerve to ask him. She asked him why he always visited her, and why all the gifts for her and the children.
Of course, due to his bad English, he struggled a bit with his sentence, but he said in his thick German accent, "Vell, I visit you and your, your littles, because the kind girls here are very beautiful and cute.
She was quite amused, and blushed a bit. The man was also a bit nervous, and appeared to want to leave her office. The Priest then excused himself, and went to read the orphans a bedtime story.
He then muttered to himself, "Ach, she's catching on to me! Stupid! Zey are called little girls and boys, not child boys and girls."
