Call jokes
People always call me heartless. That’s not true. I have a heart... it just wasn’t meant for you.
A man walked into a bar and said, "What do you call a cum shot?"
The people running the bar said, "I don't know, nut."
The guy said, "Are you calling me a nut?"
What do you call a riot full of white people?
An avalanche.
Did you know there's a brand of coffee specifically for pedophiles?
It's called the Ep-bean.
What do you call a kid with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.
What do you call it when the Edmonton Oilers play against the Nashville Predators? A Diddy Bowl.
What do you call a cold Explain bear?
A brrr.
What do you call a Japanese car thief?
Tommy took a motor.
When I was feeling suicidal, I called the suicide hotline and they left me hanging.
I was lying on the living room carpet the other day with my girlfriend on top of me in wings and a tutu, making out.
I called her the Fallen Angel.
Name: Jack, call sign "triple".
School: Nova corps gun academy.
Location: Wyoming mountains.
What do you call a singer who can't make a song?
Taylor Swift.
What do you call a person with nobody and no nose?
When you were late to school and your teacher called you tardy, she meant that in more ways than one.
What does a stuttering Santa call Mrs. Claus?
A hoe hoe hoe.
What does a furry call a sexy furry?
A foxy lady!
I called my guy friend a cock-sucker the other day. He replied with, "Hey, 20 bucks is 20 bucks."
Yo mama so strict that when Ponyboy told her that Darry hit him, she called the cops on Darry.
What do you call the fighters with an extra chromosome?
Downy unstopables.
Your hairline so back that back in the day of your hairline, Burger King was called "Burger Prince."