Call

Call jokes

Top

Jk: Jimin, why are you so small?

Jm: Excujjimi?

Jk: No offense, Jim.

Jm: Yah, call me hyung!

Jk: But I'm bigger.

Jm: I'm older!

Jk: I'm the top and you're the bottom, so I don't think it's right to call you hyung.

Jm:......

Airplane crash

What do you call someone who is in an airplane crash who was a 2006 Stanley Cup champion with the Carolina Hurricanes?

Josef Vasicek.

Blind

Why are blinds called blinds?

Because when they aren’t closed, they are blinding!

Orphan

Why was the orphan kid bad at school? Because he wanted a phone call home.

Memes

Cyclist

When I give you the signal, I want you to roll down your window and call the oncoming cyclist a prick.

Name

My name is Devonair.

When I get a haircut, it's always bald.

Kids make fun of me, they call me "dang-near bald head."

My name is Devonair *dev-on-near*

I always thought they were making fun of me because of my name pronounced near.

Heat

What would you do if you see a guy suffocating from the heat? I would call and dial 911, holy shit!

Pianist

1st person: What do you call a blind pianist?

2nd person: What?

1st person: A pianist.

Pedophile

What's the difference between me calling my girlfriend a pedophile and her calling me one?

Oh wait, I am because she's 10.

Advice

I'm what they call a ✨️askhole✨️.

A person who will consistently ask for your advice and wisdom, but then proceed to do the exact opposite of what you say.

Rapper

What do you call a group of rappers waiting in line?

A rhyme queue.

Cricket

Some rules of childhood cricket:

1. Whose bat, his batting.

2. Mother called to go while fielding. Then the turn will not be missed.

3. If the Umpire's decision is not acceptable, the decision of the Spectator, Front Uncle, or Neighbor Aunt shall be final.