Call jokes
What do you call a funny drink?
Punch!
What do you call a kid with no arms or legs?
Don't matter what you call him, he ain't coming.
What do you call a droid that takes the long way around?
R2 Detour.
What do you call a cow with horns? A horny cow.
Did you know Disney is making a movie for suicidal people?
They're calling it Finding Emo.
So, me and my girlfriend that I just got 7 weeks ago, we’re in class. We had this sub named Mrs. Bellatrix.
We both raised our hands and she called on both of us.
Me: First of all, are we in kindergarten? We can’t be doing 4x4 kinda stuff.
Leah: And also, are you from Harry Potter?
Why do leftists call their child Ariel?
So they can decide whether it wants to be a man, woman, mermaid, or washing powder.
What do you call an American house?
A gun safe.
Ever heard of the band "Nothing but Thieves"?
Yeah, it's called RobberBand.
Two girls are at a play and are about to go on the stage.
Ally before the other girl goes on stage: Break a leg!
Rachel: Alright!
On stage, Rachel trips over a stand and breaks her leg.
Rachel calling backstage: I broke my leg!
What do you call a one-legged hippo?
A hoppo!
What do you call a toothless bear?
A gummy bear.
What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta.
Why is the day you do laundry, cook, clean, iron, and so on called a day off?
I will call my kid Monday, because whenever I see him, I feel disappointment.
What do you call a soda can’s dad? Pop!
What is the funniest hill in the world called? Hill-arious!
What do you call a gold digger?
A miner.
What did the cow call its own life? An udder mistake.
Why do you call a pineapple a pineapple?
Because it is a pineapple, pin, apple, apple, pen, doudodo.