Call jokes
What do you call a magic car?
A human.
What do you call the middle of a penny?
A center (get it? Cent-er).
What do you call a Democrat that is a progressive?
A Democrat that lost in a presidential election.
What do you call the people in the Challenger explosion?
Ashtraynauts.
What do you call a cow that was hit by an anvil? A flat iron steak.
lol anons are idiots
Superman was bored and wanted to go out. He called all his super friends, but they were all busy. He even calls Louis, but it's her time of the month.
He flies to the liquor store and buys some beer and gets drunk. As he is flying, he sees Wonder Woman naked on top of the roof. He starts thinking, "I will fly down and have sex with her sooooo fast," BURP, "that she won't know what happened," HICKUP.
He flies to her faster than the speed of light, BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG, and flies away with a smile. He passes out and crashed into a wall.
Wonder Woman jumps up and screams, "WHAT WAS THAT?"
The Invisible Man appears, holding his butt, and he gets off on Wonder Woman and says, "I don't know, but my butt hurts real bad."
People were scared of the alligator because it ate everyone, so they called for the water god Aquarius.
He said "Sea ya later, alligator!" and he drowned.
Despite Michael Jackson’s legal problems while he was alive, McDonald’s is still going to honor his life achievements in the music industry by naming a sandwich after him.
They’re going to call it the McMichael! It’s going to be a fifty year old piece of meat pressed between two eight year old buns.
Why do orphans love role-plays?
Because they can call someone "daddy."
What do you call a gay man that is not a vegetarian?
A cocksucker.
Okay, what do you call that purple thing in your mom's top dresser drawer that she calls her best best friend for some weird reason?
Dad better look out from Bob, battery-operated boyfriend, hahaha!
What do you call cheese that is not your cheese?
Nacho cheese.
Phone rings; "Are your parents home?"
Orphan; "Stop calling here!"
What do you call an orphan's family portrait?
A self-portrait.
What do you call a rapper in a wheelchair?
Young Boy Never Walk again.
What do you call a blonde who's dyed her hair brunette?
Artificial intelligence.
What do you call a school that can talk?
A school with a face!
What do you call a burnt retard?
Tomato
I don't get why it is called abortion instead of murder.
What do you call Hiroshima and Nagasaki?
The world's first microwaves.