Call jokes
What do you call a person whose heart stopped?
Dead.
"Why do people call Americans excessive?"
"It was probably because of WWII."
"Oh, you mean the war where America responded to the destruction of several ships and a harbor and the deaths of a little over a thousand by completely flattening two cities and killing hundreds of thousands of people?"
What do you call an Irish lesbian?
A Gaelic.
Sometimes, you've got to specifically go out of your way to get into trouble. It's called fun.
What do you call a rude math teacher with a lisp?
A mathive dick.
Did you know there's a place in Germany called Hanover?
Must be lots of drunks there.
What do you call a disabled person that has no legs and likes being alone?
Leaving, walking.
What do you call a kid with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.
Why is arson so fun?
IT'S A FIRE ACTIVITY!
HAHAHAHAHAHAPAHAAHAHIIRTAASIISISISHRNHHTHTHTHHNHSHSNIHTAHE
Day 83 of being trapped in þis room. I made a language. I call it hertof. I speak wiþ þe walls now.
If someone calls you fat, just ignore them. You are bigger than that!
What does a physicist call it when a suicidal person is high up? Potential energy.
What do you call a blowjob in Africa?
Breakfast.
What do you call a crowd of horny white women?
Cotton waiting to be picked.
I call my penis the truth because the truth always comes out of children’s mouths.
What word starts with n and ends with r and you wouldn’t wanna call a Black person?
You really thought n****r, didn't you?
Why does everyone call me racist?
My shadow is black.
We shouldn't call gay guys "fucking cunts" because they aren't fucking cunts, they're fucking assholes.
BlessedBrian's family reunions must be like a casting call for the Addams Family.
What do you call a group of Daveons? A "daveon-ation."
Do you know why they call me battery saver?
I get turned on when it’s below 10%.