Breakup

Breakup Jokes

Mario

What did Mario say when he broke up with Princess Peach?

It's not you, it's a-me, Mario!

Pledge

I broke up with my girlfriend because she wouldn't stand for the pledge. She was in a wheelchair.

Uncle

I broke up with my RBLX gf, and I heard my uncle crying in the other room.

Problem

When Ariana Grande broke up with Pete, she said, "I have one less problem without you."

Girlfriend

My girlfriend just broke up with me because I held a door for another girl. She said I was cheating, but the girl I helped was in a wheelchair.

Relationship

If my phone battery lasted as long as my relationship, I would never be able to play on my phone.

Pedophile

My girlfriend broke up with me yesterday. I asked her why. She said, "Because you're a pedophile." I replied, "Pedophile! That's a big word for an eight year old."

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  • Relationship

    My last relationship ended because my ex-girlfriend accused me of being a rapist. I'm not upset. To be honest, I didn't like her anyway. She kept telling me I never listen, or something like that.

    Ableist

    How am I an ableist? My ex-girlfriend was in a wheelchair, and we lived in the same old building with a broken elevator. I ended the relationship by moving to the 8th floor.

    Girlfriend

    I once was playing with my friend and Roblox girlfriend, then one day, they cheated on me. I broke up with her and unfriended him, then I saw my mom and my uncle crying!

    Me be like: ;-;

    Banana

    My girlfriend broke up with me because she caught me eating a banana with my butt........

    IMAGINE!

    Boyfriend

    I had a boyfriend once. He broke up with me because he "wanted to be more alive." I guess it didn't work when he went to my basement.

    Ex

    So a girl says to her ex, "I can't get you out of my mind, the boyfriend I knew." The girl replies, "I see you in everything, like when I'm walking down the street, even at work, like trash cans are everywhere."

    Cellphone

    Girlfriend: You remind me of a cellphone.

    Ex-Boyfriend: How and why?

    Girlfriend: Because you're about to die!