Breakup jokes

My ex misses me, but her aim is getting better.

My ex broke up with me the day before his birthday. Yeah, he never got to see anything on his birthday. Next thing you know, I'm now in prison.

My girlfriend broke up with me, so I took her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?

Hey, I broke up with your girl.

-Me: What? Why?

Wait, what?

-Me: You f**ked her, so it's your baby.

I broke up with my ex girlfriend. Here's her number.

Sike, that's the wrong number!

ooooooooooooooooooooo

My girlfriend broke up with me today, but it’s ok.

She said we can still be cousins.

My girlfriend asked me to tell a joke. I told her to look in the mirror.

We never met again.

My girlfriend broke up with me because I have a small dick. Too bad for her, because I give good sex.

Why did the man walk into a bar?

Because he just broke up and he needs alcohol, you dummy!

"Gwen, I want my boyfriend back!"

My girlfriend broke up with me, so I stole her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back!

Hey anime girl, I hope you know that Jayden is a boy and we got back together.

Hahahaha, you never had a chance, so hahahaha!

When you have an ex, you will notice that the word "ex" is short for "executed," so that's there for yous.

Me: What's that sound?

Ex: What?

Me: Oh, it's the elevator going up. BYEEEE see you on another level!

"Just ditched a woman. Feelin' good!" -Techno

The longer the relationship, the longer the breakup will hurt you. Better break up now ooo.🤣

So my ex, who wouldn't leave me alone because she thought I was the best person in the world even though Will has a better haircut than me, but anyway, when we broke up she said I was the worst person she ever met, and I told her she looks like a cross between a beaver and a mole rat.

Then I told her she has the Wendy's logo haircut and then some other things I'm not gonna say. 2 years of bullshit, I was done.

Anyways, she cried lol.

Gwen: Prince, they told me you'd be crying back. What do you want?

Prince: Nothing...BUT CAN WE GET BACK TOGETHER!?!??

Gwen: Sorry...BUT...I have a life to live now. I'm logging off this site and going to watch some TV. I'll be back in 1 hour, but we are done...DONE...DONE.

Why did the booty break up with the fart?

It was just too much GASLIGHTING.

Oooh, I fall apart. Oooh, yeah, mmhmm. She told me that I'm not enough, yeah, And she left me with a broken heart, yeah. She fooled me twice and it's all my fault, yeah. She cut too deep, now she left me scarred, yeah. Now there's too many thoughts goin' through my brain, yeah, And now I'm takin' these shots like it's Novocaine, yeah. Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought Never caught a feelin' this hard Harder than the liquor I pour Tell me you don't want me no more But I can't let go Everybody told me so Feelin' like I sold my soul Devil in the form of a whore Devil in the form of a whore You said it No, you said it No, you said it We'd be together Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought Ice keep pourin' and the drink keep flowin' Try to brush it off but it keep on goin' Covered in scars and I can't help showin' Whippin' in the foreign and the tears keep blowin' Ice keep droppin' and the drink keep flowin' Try to brush it off but it keep on goin' All these scars, can't help from showin' Whippin' in the foreign and the tears keep blowin', yeah Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought.