Body jokes
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Draggin’.
Draggin’ who?
Draggin’ these balls around yo’ face.
Why did the doorbell have a good sense of humor?
Because it got everybody's pokes!
Don't you just hate it when your grandmas always complaining about things getting stuck between her false teeth, like my foreskin?
What is smegma name?
Do you know Imagine Dragons? Imagine dragon these nuts across your face!
When is a right time to dance on a body? If it is under the floorboards.
My wife went to Niagara Falls and fell. She broke every bone in her body.
One year later, she recovered. She slipped on an orange peel and died.
Q. What's the most musical bone?
A. The trom-bone!
I don't think I'm allergic to this.
What flowers are on your face?
Getting hurt is a bone-breaking experience. It's such a spine-tingling event!
I don’t understand why Christians are so against body piercings. Didn’t Jesus have four?
- Got myself a bathroom scale so now I know exactly how much I poop.
- Right. So you weigh yourself before and after you poop and calculate the difference? That’s cool.
- Oh...that might actually be even easier.
Everybody loves guns!
Every time I show them mine, they give me free stuff.
What did the balls say to the dick?
Hey dick, how's it hanging?
A slag is like the first piece of bread in a loaf. Everyone touches it, but nobody wants it.
What's worse than eating 5 raw oysters out of your grandmother's vagina?
Realizing you only put in 4.
What do you call a vagina with teeth?
A vicious cunt.
Why do so many people get charged with rape? Because they are too stupid to finish her off and bury the body.
Some guy farts and says, "That was some asshole behind me."