Body jokes
The girl asks her boyfriend, "Are you jealous of my heart?"
He says, "No."
She says, "Because it's pumping in me and you're not."
What has 4 legs, then 3 legs, then 2 legs, then 1 leg, then no legs?
A baby you cut one off each time.
Why did the doorbell have a good sense of humor?
Because it got everybody's pokes!
Why did the guy's birthday party stink?
Because he was turning farty!
What does an orphan and a female's mouth have in common?
They take in 100's of kids.
When I shit in the toilet, I think that if I shit hard enough, I can see my asshole plug.
Why don't women parachute naked?
That annoying whistling sound on the way down.
Somebody stole my joke.
So I stole their spinal cord.
If you scanned my thigh, it would show up as a package of Oreos on the screen.
When I aim this trigger, it all goes red.
Do you have a bounty 'cause you got a "M" on your head?
Person A: C'mon person B, just be happy, smile.
Person B: Over my dead body.
Person B: *gets the noose*
I have a question: Does aging affect corpses, too?
Just asking to know if I still count as a pedophile or not!
It's like your hairline and your forehead had a disagreement.
I came across a dead body in the woods. I liked it so much I came again.
Why is Sally dead? Cause she has no arms.
Ball stretcher.
Vagina jokes aren’t funny, period.
What can’t a person with no arms do: if you're happy and you know it, clap your hands.
If you can’t touch your brain or see your brain, you don’t have a brain?
If I have ligma and you have ligma, how about you ligma balls? 😏 (It’s all about how you pronounce the end.)