Body jokes
Why did the guy's birthday party stink?
Because he was turning farty!
A lady walks into a dentist's office, sits on the counter, and spreads her legs. The dentist says, "I think you have the wrong idea." The lady replies, "Last week you gave my husband his false teeth; now you can get them out."
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
Because the grass tickles their balls.
Jeff asks, "Did you hear about the guy they call the flash?"
Bob responds, "No, I haven't. Do they call him that because he runs fast?"
Jeff replies, "Nah, they call him that because he doesn't wear pants."
What did the cowboy say to the girl on the beach?
"Sandy cheeks."
Defenity peeing with an erection
My doctor is a very attractive woman; gorgeous face, nice boobs, smoking hot body. She said to me, “You are in your 50’s now, you have GOT to stop masturbating.” I asked why. She replied, “Because I’m trying to examine you, ya’ pervert!!!”
What do you call a fat midget?
Jigglypuff.
A guy went to a bar and said to a friend that he found a girl on the railroads and said they had the best sex ever.
His friend asked, "Did you get any head?"
The guy said, "No, I couldn't find it."
What are the basic ingredients when a cannibal makes a sandwich?
2 slices of Brad.
When I’m bored, I text a random number, “I hid the body... now what?”
What do you say to a feminist with no arms and no legs?
"Nice tits, bitch."
Why don't women parachute naked?
That annoying whistling sound on the way down.
Cremation. My final hope for a smokin’ hot body!
You're so skinny that the professor thought you were the skeleton.
I saw my wife at the dam yesterday, which sucks because I wanted her to flow further down.
After an intense workout, I finally have the body I've always dreamed of.
It's in my basement.
Get a calculator.
Okay, anyways, Sally has 69 bottles of boobs (because she is a cannibal that collects boobs) and her friend said it was 222 many. She got caught by the police and was taken to 51st Street. She got arrested for x8 days, so she was BOOBLESS.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Draggin’.
Draggin’ who?
Draggin’ these balls around yo’ face.
What is smegma name?
When is a right time to dance on a body? If it is under the floorboards.