Getting hurt is a bone-breaking experience. It's such a spine-tingling event!
After an intense workout, I finally have the body I've always dreamed of.
It's in my basement.
Cremation. My final hope for a smokin’ hot body!
I saw my wife at the dam yesterday, which sucks because I wanted her to flow further down.
Why don't women parachute naked?
That annoying whistling sound on the way down.
Sleep paralysis for the first time and this is what I see except it's face and body is way more stringy and hollow.
What are the basic ingredients when a cannibal makes a sandwich?
2 slices of Brad.
What does my arm have in common with paper?
They both can be cut.
What flowers are on your face?
Why did the doorbell have a good sense of humor?
Because it got everybody's pokes!
I was going to talk about your chin, but I wasn't sure which one to write about.
Get a calculator.
Okay, anyways, Sally has 69 bottles of boobs (because she is a cannibal that collects boobs) and her friend said it was 222 many. She got caught by the police and was taken to 51st Street. She got arrested for x8 days, so she was BOOBLESS.
What do you call lesbian sex during their period?
A blood transfusion.
A guy went to a bar and said to a friend that he found a girl on the railroads and said they had the best sex ever.
His friend asked, "Did you get any head?"
The guy said, "No, I couldn't find it."
When is a right time to dance on a body? If it is under the floorboards.
Don't you just hate it when your grandmas always complaining about things getting stuck between her false teeth, like my foreskin?
I don’t understand why Christians are so against body piercings. Didn’t Jesus have four?
What's the difference between an anal and oral thermometer?
The taste.
What did the balls say to the dick?
Hey dick, how's it hanging?
So little Susie came home and said, "Mom, little Johnny showed me his pecker."
And her mom said, "WHAT?!"
And little Susie was like, "Yeah, it reminded me of a peanut." Her mom said, "Oh, because it was so small?"
Susie said, "No, because it tasted salty."
Everybody loves guns!
Every time I show them mine, they give me free stuff.
