Just saying this, but I hate how many little kids there are on this site, and when they post, they have the worst posts about "sex", so I'm just saying how they act immature.
People are so f***ed up. I belated "Frickin' BTW!"
What did the emo say to the popular kid?
"Go fuck yourself for thinking all emos cut because they don't... y'know, for a matter of fact, fuck all you guys..."
I burned an orphan's hand and then they said, "You will pay for this."
Me: "What are you going to do? Tell your parents?"
TELL ME YOU'VE DONE THIS WITHOUT TELLING ME YOU'VE DONE THIS.!!! So, we all know when y'all were in school, y'all would fart, but y'all would try to make it silent, but for me, that one day I farted loud, and everyone could hear. Everyone got to blame the annoying kid.
Mom: Don't forget to unload the dishwasher.
Mom: Did you finish your homework?
Mom: We are going to your grandmother's house for Thanksgiving.
Mom: Dad and I talked. We are getting a new car next month.
Son: You are?? Oh my gosh, thank you!
Mom: No, I was just making sure you were getting my texts.
Son: That was cruel!
You have been a bad boy, so now I will have to pun-ish you!
What does every arsehole and Tory have in common?
They all produce horrible shit.
I can never get away from my dog, he follows me everywhere. I think you two would be really good friends.
What's braver than coming out gay? Taking a shit in an elementary school bathroom with those two kids that always mess with you and turn off the lights.
Women be like I don't wear makeup for men.
Then get mad when a man doesn't compliment her in her makeup!
Three good friends decided to meet in their favorite caffe.
The meetup was a successful one, because they all enjoyed themselves.
When you're mad, you might as well just punch an orphan because what can they do, tell their parents?
My brother has a fucking ass and I wake up to him twerking.
Q: Why do men say "ladies first?"
A: So they can look at their a**.
Habit.
Why was Goofy in the bathroom?
He was goofing off!
Vital information: if you find a stray dog in an alleyway, don't stare at its eyes.
Mom, why was I adopted?
Because people are terrible, and that’s how the world works, son!
Ok, Dad, the world is TERRIBLE!
What did the fish say to the other fish when it got hooked?
"That's what you get for not keeping your mouth shut."
