Art

Art jokes

T pose

Why do animators like Christianity?

Because Jesus was the one who invented T-Pose.

Comedian

The worst comedians take 9 months to make a joke. Then they spend the rest of their lives trying to forget it.

Baby

How many babies does it take to paint a wall?

Depends on how hard you throw it.

Memes

Baby

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them.

Jesus

Q: What's the difference between Jesus and a picture?

A: One uses one nail to hang.

Teacher

A note for My arts/health teacher:

oh ms aziz, you've got no rizz, all she do is screams, whether u like it or not, she thinks this makes her hot, she thinks this makes her pop but it just makes me want to crack her head from the top, until she says STOP, and down on the ground she goes plop... and her screaming has finally stopped, and my plan hasn't flopped thus far.... plan B is ram her with my car, fill her shoes with tar, and the prahnas i'll set on her go RAWR... she don't know what she coming for.

Paint

What brand of paint did Michael Jackson use to paint Neverland Ranch?

Dutch Boy.

Poetry

They told me I'd never be good at poetry.

But to date I have made 3 jugs and a vase, and they look lovely!

Paper

I was going to make a joke about a piece of paper.

It's just too tear-able.

Jesus

What’s the difference between the real Jesus and a picture of him?

It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.

Mother

"Jesus can turn water into wine, but I can turn your mother into mine."

- Sun Tzu, *The Art of Creating War*

Strategy

"If we don’t have a strategy, then the enemy will never know our strategy."

-Sun Tzu, Art of War.

Hairline

*True story*

I saw this guy with a very bad hairline who was painting himself blue and it said "Smurf Paint," but I shouted, "Megamind!"

Artist

What do CG artists and porn stars have in common?

They both composite (cum pose it) at the end.