Animal jokes
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get ran over by a truck.
Teacher: "Ok class, what animal jumps the highest?"
Kid: "A leopard."
Quiet kid: "No, it's emo kids. Some of them are still in the air."
Kid: "Broooooooooooo."
A seal walks into a club.
What creature takes the most medicine?
Caterpillar.
Why do lions 🦁 go to SUBWAY 🥪?
Because they like to EAT FLESH.
Doc: Can I help you?
Girl: Doctor, I have pain in my heart.
Doc: When did it begin?
Girl: Right now (seeing him like a doll).
Doc: Hh...do you like me? I know I am handsome...
Girl: No, don’t get me wrong. You just look like someone I know.
Doc: Who is that? Is your boyfriend?
Girl: No, it’s my pet (rabbit), his name is Rokie.
What's yellow and can’t swim?
Your dead fish.
How did the cow break up with the other cow? He said he moo-ved on.
Bald Eagle.
What type of bee makes milk?
A boobee.
Q: Why did the cat get a ticket?
A: He was caught littering.
Q: Why did the cat get arrested?
A: He was caught littering.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the fool's house.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
Why couldn’t the kitten watch the movie? It had a violent cat-e-gory.
Two lesbians adopted a cat. That night, the cat ran away. Why?
Because it heard one say, "I'm gonna eat that pussy."
Why's missy Shaw such a slug? Because she's obese. Hahahahahaha!
What food does a cheetah eat?
Fast food.
Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building? Of course. The Empire State Building can't jump.
So, a bear and a rabbit are in a field. The bear turns to the rabbit and asks, "Does your poop stick to your fur?" The rabbit replied, "No." Then the bear picks up the rabbit and wipes his butt.
What do you call a camel stranded in the desert of Arabia?
A Shawarmano Cameldo!