Animal jokes
Sad news, my obese parrot died today.
Mind you, it's a huge weight off my shoulders.
Who would win in a race, Stephen Hawking or a turtle?
The turtle, because it can walk.
The 🦅 asked the female eagle, "What did you eat?"
"I ate New York hot dogs."
Why did the frog cross the road to hop to his side, Bih?
How did Jenson lose against a Cheetah?
Because he was a cheetah!
Memes
Meme:
My wife got mad at me because I took our life savings and brought golden retrievers.
Like, bitch, we can get gold because of these golden retrievers.
What is bigger than an elephant but smaller than two elephants?
A different sized elephant.
A guy says to his dog, "Where are you?" The dog was actually dead, bro.
What is mad cow disease?
Guess what?
What?
Chicken butt!
Who is the king of the insects 🐜?
The Monarch!
What do you call a dog with no legs?
Ground beef.
Kid: Why aren’t koalas considered bears?
Nerd: Because they're marsupials.
Kid: No, because they didn’t have the koala-fication!
What did all the humans say when all the pets left town?
A doggone catastrophe!
What is a cheetah's favorite snack?
Cheetos.
Why did the qack go duck?
I don't know, rhydon deez. 4x2=8
There were 3 Gay Fish in a Tank. One says to the others: "How do you drive this thing?"
Like this joke if you LOLed! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
How does a cow introduce his wife?
Meet Patty.
My mom wanted me to brush my hair.
And I just told her that even pet animals don't like their hair brushed...
Chicken