Animal jokes
What kind of bees produce milk? Boobees.
What's the difference between a puppy and an orphan?
Puppies get adopted.
One day a teacher says: "What does a pig give us?"
A student says: "Bacon!"
The teacher says: "Good! Now, what does a chicken give us?"
A student says: "Eggs!"
The teacher says: "Good! Now, what does a fat cow give us?"
A student says: "Homework!"
The whole class laughs.
Q: I like elephants.
A: Everything else is irrelephant.
What do gay horses eat?
Hayyyyy!
What do you call a donkey and a potato?
Assround
What’s black and white and red all over?
A crushed nun!
What’s that black stuff between an elephants toes?
Slow natives.
I can't take my dog to the pond anymore because the ducks keep attacking him. That's what I get for buying a pure bred dog.
What's the easiest way to make a glow worm happy? Cut off its tail—it'll be delighted!
What did Ahsan do?
Meow meow.
Me: What has two legs and bleeds?
Friend: Um, women? Obviously?
Me: Actually, half a dog. So you're still right.
I can’t take my dog to the park anymore.
Why?
The ducks keep trying to eat him.
Why would they do that?
Because he’s pure-bread.
What’s worse than spiders on your piano?
Craps on your organ.
What do you call a guy who loves to eat out a hoe's pussy?
Answer: a Carnivwhore.
If a tree could be any animal, what would it be?
Answer: A dog because of its bark lol. 😀
Why did the frog take the bus to work?
His car got toad.
I could have sworn while watching anime I saw an American Boeing B-29 Superfortress in the background dropping bombs!
What did the duck do when he crossed the road?
The duck jumped into a pool of ant piles! 💀💀
I met a fat chick at the beach.
People started asking me what I use for bait, or do you want us to help throw the whale back in the water?
What do you call a teddy bear that fooled you?
Stuffed.