Animal jokes
Your mom is so fat, when she swam in the sea, Wales came up to her and said, "We are family, even now you’re fatter than me."
A small boy went up to a dog fountain? The more you. HAHA gorgeous ddollars of benjamin frnakus wghen hes wearing beakini bea at the beach hahaha.
What happens when a cow farm gets destroyed, then built up again?
It'll be udder renovation!
A dog walked into a tavern and said, “I can’t see a thing. I’ll open this one.” The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.
Which dinosaurs masturbated the most? Triceratops, they were the horniest!
What do you call it when a cow gets disciplined by her parents?
Grounded beef.
How did the chicken 🐔 feel after escaping the fry cook?
Clucky!
What does an orphan and a dog have in common?
Both got taken from their parents.
Why would the chicken not cross the road?
Because it's too old. (The joke is old.) (The chicken is old.)
What's a bison's favorite gun?
A PP Bizon.
What's the difference between the Barracuda car and a fish?
The fish can't go fast.
What happens when animals do a squat?
It doesn't become pretty...
How do bees get to school?
They go on a school buzz.
What is a gorilla's favorite cookie?
It's chocolate chimp.
What do you call an octopus on land?
A spider, duh!
Your uncle Jack is stuck on the horse...
Would you help him jack off the horse?
A flock of swallows were migrating south as a jet flew past them.
"Why was that one flying so fast?" asked one. Another answers, "Can't you see his tail is burning?"
What do you call a bird with no wings?
Moas didn't even know that existed!
A cow in an earthquake is called a milkshake.
What do sloths and depressed people have in common?
They both hang from the tree.