Always jokes
How do you stay warm in a cold room?
You go to the corners. It's always 90 degrees.
Why don't midgets use tampons?
Answer: They are always tripping over the string.
Rizz,
Are you a biographer? Cause I picture us together.
Can I take a picture of you for I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?
No pen, no paper, you still draw my attention.
You know what I hate about math? They always talk about x and y, but not about u and i.
"I always like walking in the rain, so no one can see me crying."
- Charlie Chaplin
Why can’t the employee tell dirty laundry jokes?
Because they always come out clean.
Why can't a kid with ADHD shoot a gun?
Their focus is always off.
This is how my mom always threatens me: "I brought you into this world, I can bring you out of it too." That's why I only have 2 siblings left.
I wonder where the bodies are?
What fruit always feels depressed?
A blueberry.
Why doesn't China have a cricket team?
They always eat the bat.
I don't always roll a joint, but when I do, it's my ankle.
There was always that one specific person you thought ruined your life, but it turns out your life has always been ruined by you being in it.
I’ve always been a bit insecure about having thicker thighs.
Now I realize it allows me to fit more scars!
I feel bad for shopping carts. They're always being pushed around.
I will always remember my grandfather's last words: "I'll just check if it's poisonous."
Why should you be wary of stairs? -- Because they are always up to something.
Why are blind people so good at being a Jedi?
They are always swinging a stick.
Santa and Bill Cosby's favorite quote: "Don't be dumb, make sure they're numb, and always use a condom!"
I know why Asian's eyes are always closed. It's because Americans are so fat and ugly.
Nurse: Don't worry, I'm great with babies. Parents: You are? Nurse: Yeah, I always abort them. Parent:... Parent: You're hired.
When you’re playing dead and the school shooter starts unbuckling his belt and you hear him say, “This boy always had a fat ass.”