Always jokes
Why are Asian's eyes always squinted?
Nukes are bright.
Why do Roman Catholics always call their minister father?
because Roman Catholic men between 18-29 years old received a free anonymous blowjob inside the confessional booth at the glory hole.
I was always poked and told at weddings your next...
So I went to funerals and poked them and said your next.....
My dad always told me I should sing tenor. Ten or twelve miles away.
I love eating pussy. That’s why the animal shelter is always my go-to for a good meal.
Memes
It's ALWAYS like this
When my son was little, he loved to draw. Although he would always rip up the paper whenever there was one little slip up. Too bad he became a tattoo artist.....
Why was the Tower of Pisa always leaning?
Cuz it wanted better accuracy than the Twin Towers.
They always say you are what you eat! So I’d be nothing. That sounds about right.
Q: Why do depressed people always have colored hair?
A: That’s as close as they can get to dye.
I've always been suicidal. Some might say, "Why haven't I actually done the act?" I'll just say, well, I hate myself too much so I thought I'd stay around for the punishment of staying alive.
What place can you always find suicidal cows at?
"McDonald's."
My dad always wanted one last smoke before his death, so we smoked his ashes.
I unfriended Paul Walker on Xbox because he was always on the dashboard.
If I'm ugly, why do you always look at me when I come in the door?
I wanted to be an astronaut, but my parents always told me when I was little that the sky was the limit.
I never knew the kid at school had autism. I always just thought he was walking into cobwebs.
Why is Stephen Hawking good at skateboarding? Because he's always on the ramps.
People always told me to open doors for elders. So I opened the plane door 5,000 feet up in the air for a grandma.
Why should you always give an emo a high five in the hallway? You can’t leave them hanging.
I hate prom in Alabama. They always say, "Uhh, actually this is our family reunion." We are in Alabama, so they are the same thing.