Roman Catholic jokes

Why do Roman Catholics always call their minister father?

because Roman Catholic men between 18-29 years old received a free anonymous blowjob inside the confessional booth at the glory hole.

How do you trick a homophobic heterosexual male that is a Roman Catholic priest into using the glory hole inside the men's restroom at a gay bar?

Tell him that it is a confessional booth.

Why do Roman Catholics have so many kids?

So there’s more for the priest.

Why did the Polish Roman Catholic priest remove zippers from the pants of gay men in the LGBT community?

Because he lost his key to his house and he was desperate to get back inside of his house and he thought that one of keys to their zippers would be able to unlock the door of his house.

Why did the Italian American Roman Catholic priest perform fellatio on gay men at the glory hole inside the adult bookstore?

Someone asked him what would he do for a Klondike Bar?

A priest and a rabbi run out of a burning church, and the priest says, "What about the children?" The rabbi says, "Fuck the children." And the priest says, "Do you think we'll have time?"

Three nuns are talking, and the first nun says, "You would never believe what I discovered." Intrigued, the others signal her to continue. "I found a phone in the priest's room," said the first nun. "Oh, that's nothing," said the second one. "I found condoms in one of his drawers." said the second one. "What did you do with them?" said the first nun. Pridefully, the second nun responds with, "I poked holes in all of them." and the third nun says, "Oh sh*t...."

How do you trick a Catholic priest into using the glory hole at an adult bookstore? Tell him it is a confessional booth.

A Muslim is about to commit suicide when a Catholic priest stops him.

"What are you doing?!" exclaims the priest.

"There is nothing on this Earth for me," the Muslim says. "I will commit suicide to go to paradise and get 72 virgins!"

The priest shakes his head.

"Foolish Muslim, suicide is not the way!" he says.

"Follow me, I'll take you to the local primary school."

What do Catholic priests and school shooters have in common?

They both like to dump their loads into little kids.