Agriculture jokes
What do you call a cow with no legs?
(Answer) Ground beef.
Sorry for a bad joke.
Why couldn't the man get out of the maize maze?
He got corn-ered!
What was the incontinent farmer's greatest problem? He managed his carrot patch but couldn't control his peas!
Why don't Amish people water ski?
Because their horses would drown.
What did the cow say every morning?
Good moorning!
How do you count cows?
With a cowculator.
One day, Billy cow wandered off to the railroad tracks where his mother always told him not to go. His mother asked him where he had gone when he got home. He replied that he was just going for a graze. His neighbor later told his mother he had saw him at the railroad tracks. What would you call Billy cow now?
Ground Beef.
What's the difference between an apple tree and an orphan? The apples get picked.
Have you heard about the awesome fruit race?
The lettuce was ahead, but the tomato was able to ketchup!
What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A piece of ass that makes your eyes water.
What do you call a chicken with no legs? Ground chicken 🤣💀🐔 Get WRAY'DDDDD!
As a lifelong farmer, I was excited that Ligue 1 was moving up the UEFA ranking toward an Industrial Revolution and I can finally leave the farm. Alas, Pessi joined and we went down a rank because he is so finished. Shame on you Pessi, now I have to go back to shoveling cow shit.
What's a cow's strongest part of their body?
Their "calves"!
A farmer walks up to his farmer neighbor with a jug of milk. The farmer says, "I milked your cow." The neighbor replies, "I have a bull, not a cow."
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the idiot's house.
Knock knock?
Who's there?
The chicken!
What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? Where's popcorn?
What do you call a cow that eats grass?
A lawn mooer.
Where do all orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.
What's the difference between a cow and a pig?
One is a pig.
What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
De-calf-inated.