Agriculture jokes
What do you call a bad bull?
A bully.
I have a cow over at my house spending the night with me because she has been out in the streets homeless and poor, so my family forced it to come and live with me at my place.
The cow asks me, "Where do I keep all the dairy items like the milk, cheese, yogurt, and meat?" I tell her, "In the refrigerator! Where do you think I keep them, on the farm with all the rest of those cows?"
That night we had to share a room and sleep in the same damn bed. Then she started getting high and drank some cow wine with titty milk, and it made her shit all over the bed.
What happens when you cross a cow and a redneck?
The redneck fucks the cow.
How do you f**k a sheep?
Put your d**k in it and face it off the cliff edge. It'll keep going backwards as you push forwards.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree? The apples get picked.
Why did the ox get kicked out of the herd?
Because it wasn't being an ox, it was being a butt-ox...!
What is a cow's favorite class in school?
Moosic.
My name is Bob, and I am a cow.
My grandfather was a knight, and his name was Sir Loin.
What do cows like to do?
Cow-culating!
If you wear cowboy clothes, are you ranch dressing?
A person went to tell a joke: "Knock knock!" "Who’s there?" "I don’t remember!" (I think we need to moove on to the next joke now.)
I just now made this one up! Then I realized it is in the cow category, so I added the moove on part! 😂
Why did the beans fuck the mum to make bouncing beans?
What did the cow say when he lost his tractor?
"Where's my tractor?"
Why did the cow eat?
Because it was hungry.
What is a cowboy’s favorite tree?
A horse chestnut tree.
What kind of nuts come in cans?
Creamed a-corn.
If a walnut is a nut on the wall, then what is a peanut?
What’s a green cucumber?
A carrot.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple tray? The apple tray gets picked.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
Apples get picked.