Aed jokes
"White beta males and fake alpha males are a joke that goes for POC men too."
When babies kick their mother, it's okay, but when I do it, it's a crime...
Why are bees' hair always sticky?
Because they use a honeycomb...
"Left, center, right, and apolitical, also skeptical, are also a joke."
Another condom name is "Orphan's Home."
When an orphan takes a family photo, it’s called a selfie.
Q: What did the ocean say to the boy?
A: Nothing! Oceans don't talk, silly!
My mom told me to be positive...
I was heading to an HIV test.
What do you call a deaf dog? As you like, he doesn't hear you anyway.
Jim was caught beating a man up. Brooklyn took a picture of his license plate with her phone and told him, "Your life is ruined!" So Jim took a picture of her, and the next thing you know, he said, "Now my phone is ruined!"
Roses are red, violets are blue,
I fucked a chimpanzee behind my local zoo.
What's a smart person's favorite candy? Nerds! :D
I saw a kid crying and asked him where his parents were. He started crying harder.
The ungrateful brat. I see why he is an orphan.
I asked my mom what her biggest regret was for a project at school, and she said, "Oh, go look in the bathroom above the sink..." There was a mirror.
Why doesn't the orphan's phone have a homepage, being it doesn't have a home?
Why do orphans play with other kids on a playground?
So they will sneak into their parents' car to be a brother or sister.
If reincarnation is correct, if you die now, you can be reborn and live a second life. If you were born in Ukraine, you can immediately live a third life.
A guy walks into a restaurant and orders turtle soup. The waiter hollers, "One turtle soup!"
A moment later, the guy calls the waiter over and says, "I’ve changed my mind, I would like pea soup." The waiter hollers, "Hold the turtle, and make it pea!"
You're built like a double cheeseburger.
Why does the singer put a radio in her fridge?
Because she can listen to call music.