Aed jokes
Sodomising a physically challenged homophobic heterosexual white male is better than the smallest act of kindness.
Q: What did the porn actress say when she opened the door?
A: Make sure to come upstairs!
What's the difference between 911 and a Mexican gardener?
One of them is an outside job.
Two Indians talk over a long distance using smoke signals.
In the middle of the conversation, a nuclear bomb explodes behind one of them, and a huge cloud of smoke rises silently into the sky.
The other Indian signals with smoke: "Not so loud!"
What is something you can’t say in a superhero movie?
“Is it a bird, is it a plane, well whatever it is, it’s heading straight for the World Trade Center.”
I decided to take my mother-in-law out the other day. I love being a hitman.
Why would an orphan be a good Spider-Man?
Because his parents will be far from home.
I saw a monkey outside of school and said, "Look, a monkey!" I got expelled the next day.
👱♀️ 👱♂️What is the difference between two blondes and a Libertarian?
A Libertarian hasn't won a presidential election since 1972, and two blondes are too stupid to run in a presidential election.
Why is Kanye West's haircut actually years of work by many doctors to piece together skull fragments like a jigsaw puzzle?
Because Kanye once interrupted Chuck Norris on the set of "Walker Texas Ranger."
Oh, Lois, that was more scary than Michael Jackson without pants in front of a kid!
What’s the difference between an orphan and a leaf? Only one falls down the family tree.
If you want KFC, pour water on a poor person outside our restaurant and film it.
So, a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex.
When he gets to the bar, he brags about the different sex positions they used, and one of the guys says, "Oh, did you do head?"
He responded with, "No, I couldn't find the head."
What do you call a transgender person? Nintendo Switch.
What is Hitler's favorite animal?
A dolphin.
What do you get when you mix birth control and LSD?
A trip without kids.
(some kid crying because hes an orphan and kids are bulling him) teacher:HEY i was a orphan to so if you bully him your basicly trying to bully me too me:OOF teacher:now is somebody not here? me:your parents
What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user?
Fast food.
What do you call a gay Eskimo?
A snow blower.