Aed jokes
What's the worst thing to say at a live birth?
"Hi guys, welcome to my unboxing video!"
Did you hear? There's a new fast food restaurant coming: Jacko in the Box.
Two guys watching a war movie at a bar are talking. One says to the other, "The Nazis starved my dad to death in a concentration camp during the war."
The other says, "My dad died in a camp as well... he broke his neck."
First guy says, "How did he break his neck?"
Second guy says, "He fell out of the guard tower."
Soldiers, there is one thing you can be sure of: You will be at home with your families, in a jar on the mantelpiece.
Do people even like me, C. A. S. N. O. V. A.?
lollll
Me: What do we need from there? I have a few things to do before I head out to the store, and then I will be home to pick up the stuff.
Random person: What stuff? 🤨
Me: What?
The person: You said you’re going to pick up “the stuff”!!! What do you mean by that?!
Me: Colourful flamingo fart.
If Stephen Hawking got into a fight, he could not stand up for himself.
What do you call a gay priest? Hahahahahaha!
Your mom is so dumb that she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.
ICH BIN GOTT.
Your mum sat on a phone, and she turned it into a pancake.
How do you know a gay guy has been in your house?
There are speedos in the microwave.
What is the difference between a kid with cancer and dark humor?
Dark humor never dies!
A computer is a HARDware device. How come someone still feels it is MicroSOFT?
Yo mama so fat, they had to give her a license plate.
Doctor: I’m so sorry, sir, but you only have a couple months left.
The sir: My children will be devastated.
Doctor: But I have a shot that can change that.
The sir: Whatever it takes.
*Suppressed gunshots*
What sound do you get when you cross a cow with a cat?
Meow.
Joe Mama has a chode.
My sister said download "Among Us" on my iPad, so I did. Then she taught me to play. Then she told me a code and told me where to put it, and I typed in the code.
Then she was the imposter, and I was a crewmate, so I was sticking with her, and she killed me when we made it to the medbay.
One day, there were three people: a mom and two kids. One of the kids walks up and asks her mom why she was named Rose. Her mom told her that she ate a rose petal when she was born; that is why she was named Rose.
Then the second child walked up and yelled, "Ahhhhhh!" and the mom said, "Shut up, Billy Goat!"