Aed jokes
A teenage guy is taking a girl to a dance. First, he goes to buy her flowers, but there’s a really long line at the florist. Finally, he buys them.
Then, he goes to rent a tux, but there’s a really long line for that, too. After a few hours, he gets the tux.
That night, he picks up the girl and they go to the school for the dance. There’s a long line to get in that goes halfway around the school. A while later, they finally get in. They dance and talk for a while, then the guy gets thirsty, so he goes over to the table to get punch. There is no punch line.
Roses are red, just like your lips.
Mountains are big, just like your tits.
What’s the Twin Towers' favorite kind of pizza?
A: Plain.
One day, Little Susie got her monthly bleeding for the first time in her life.
Not quite certain what was happening, and somewhat frightened, she decided to tell Little Johnny. Little Susie dropped her panties and showed Little Johnny what was happening.
Little Johnny's eyes opened wide in amazement. "You know," he said, "I'm not a doctor, but it looks like someone just ripped your balls off!"
I would tell a dad joke, but it already left me.
I asked a European what do you call Karens in your country? He said, "American women."
JFK
Half is definitely a bottom.
Q: What's the difference between a nun and a woman in a bathtub?
A: One has hope in her soul and one has soap in her hole.
Where does a snowman keep his money?
In a snowbank.
What has four legs and one arm? A rottweiler at a park.
How does a priest purify water?
Boil the hell out of it!
What do you call a U.S. border hopper?
A Mexican jumping bean.
Lesson in laziness number 136894236842: don't be too lazy to read large numbers.
What do you call a pineapple in a pun?
A Puneapple.
What do a condom and a gun have in common? You should never use either one of them.
Q. What do Kenny's dick and this joke have in common?
A. They're both really short.
What do you call a dog wearing a beret?
Smeargle!
What is meals on wheels to a Christian nationalist that is also a conservative Republican politician, a gay man in a wheelchair that is poor and also physically handicapped, and who is also well-endowed?
How do you organize a rave party in Ethiopia? Just put some bread on the ceiling.
I wanted to make a joke about dandruff.
People are still scratching their heads over it.