Aed jokes
I told a diabetic boy to have sweet dreams, and he died the next morning.
What do you call a pregnant slave? A two for one deal.
In memory of Michael Jackson, Vienna Beef, as well as various places, is introducing the Jackson Dog. A 50 year old sausage between a 9 year old bun.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a dead pedophile? Nothing.
What kind of fish comes out at night?
A starfish.
What's the best thing about a blowjob?
- The silence.
Sans: Zzzzzzzz.
Papyrus: SANS, WAKE UP!!
Sans: What is it, dude?
Papyrus: A human has fallen from the surface world!
Sans: And you gotta BONE to pick with 'em??
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
Apples get picked.
Today is sad. My sister got hit by a car, and I lost my license as a driver.
An old man walks to a busy restaurant. He tells the waiter what he wants and asks her, "Can I have a discount? I served in the war."
The waitress says, "Of course, and would you like that meal with sauce?"
"Nein," said the old man.
I was walking this hot girl home, then she noticed me, then the walk turned into a run.
What does a baby and a hand grenade have in common?
They both make noise when you throw them.
A block of gold walked into a bar. The bartender said, “AU, get out!”
What’s a sheep’s favorite fruit?
A baaaaaaaanaaaaaana!
How do you turn a baby into a dog?
Douse it in gasoline, light a match, *WOOF*!
Last night I had a dream I was swimming in lemonade... turns out I peed the bed.
How do you make a baby astronaut sleep?
You rock-it!
When is a car not a car? When it turns into a driveway. 🥁
How much does it cost a pirate to pierce his ears?
A buccaneer.
What do you call a musician 👩🎤 who drinks soda and sings 🎤 at the same time?
A popsinger.