Aed jokes
A horse and a bear walk into a bar... Oh wait, can't tell that one!
Did you hear that Stephen Hawking wrote a new book? It's called "Around The House in Eighty Days."
A man goes to the library to find the best book about committing suicide. So when he asks the librarian, "What's the best book on committing suicide?" The librarian said, "Oh, fuck off...you won't bring it back anyway."
Yo mama is so fat when she sees a bus full of white people, she thinks it's a Twinkie, lmao xd.
How do you make a cat sound like a dog?
You set it on fire; then it goes, "WOOF!"
What is the most popular fish in the ocean? "A starfish."
What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon?
One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer, and the other is just a watermelon.
What happens if an Asian walks into a wall with a boner?
They hit their nose on the wall.
If I had a dollar for every gender, I would have 2 dollars and a bunch of counterfeits.
Q: What's a pedophile's favorite place to eat?
A: Schools because there is a wide variety of choices.
Chuck does not cut butter with a knife, he cuts a knife with butter.
Where do you find white people on a bench?
- The NBA.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
She wasn't wearing a seat belt.
Why was the guitarist arrested?
He fingered a minor.
When Kim Jong-un said "nuke the Chinese", he meant put the take away in the oven. Some simple misunderstandings start a war.
What's small, brown and crispy?
A baby in an oven.
Q: What do you call a man in a wheelchair?
A: Disabled.
What is red, white, and goes round and round?
A baby in a blender.
What do you call a lazy potato chip? Lays!
What do you call an animal with 3 eyes, 2 mouths, 6 noses, and 4 ears?