Aed jokes
How do you make a lesbian upset?
Give her a multiplication test.
How do you break up a fight between two gay men?
Say, "Can you get straight to the point?"
Q. What's the best part of living in Alabama?
A. Not having to change your last name when you get married.
Have you ever thought about the fact that every market in Africa is a black market?
Why did Little Johnny drop his ice cream?
Because he got hit by a bus.
What's the difference between a white woman and a tornado siren?
The tornado siren doesn't get raped.
Your hairline is so far back that if you were a backbencher in class and I was a germ sitting on it, I would think that the rest of the backbenchers are seated in front of the class.
What is a pedophile's favorite age range?
9-11.
What's the difference between a priest and McDonald's? They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns.
How do we know Cinderella is a virgin?
Because she runs away from balls.
What’s one thing you can say during a family dinner and in bed?
"Where are the kids?"
What’s one thing you can say during a wedding and in bed?
I didn’t know we were having seafood tonight!
What’s something you can say in a grocery store and in bed?
"Thanks for coming."
What do you call a Mexican with one leg?
Border hopper.
Roses are red, flowers are pretty, I heard your mom has a nice pair of titties.
My girlfriend who is a Jehovah's Witness had sex with me so hard, she turned to Christianity.
What song do you play at a emo kid's funeral?
House of Pain—"Jump Around."
I told my brother if he wanted to have a wonderful first day of school, then he should put a cookbook in the women's sports section at the school library.
Are you a keyboard, because I wanna tap you all night long.
They say I have a silver tongue, I'll let you make it white.