You're jokes
You're so fat, Thanos had to snap three times to destroy you.
Q: How do you know when an Asian broke into your house?
A: You can't find your dog.
Girlfriend: Am I pretty or ugly?
Boyfriend: You're both!
Girlfriend: What do you mean by that?
Boyfriend: You're pretty ugly!!!
Astronaut In The Ocean-By- Masked Wolf and watersharky Music Productions-
Astro-naut
What you know about rollin' down in the deep?
When your brain goes numb, you can call that mental freeze
When these people talk too much, put that shit in slow motion, yeah
I feel like an astronaut in the ocean, ayy
What you know about rollin' down in the deep?
When your brain goes numb, you can call that mental freeze
When these people talk too much, put that shit in slow motion, yeah
I feel like an astronaut in the ocean
She say that I'm cool (damn straight)
I'm like "yeah, that's true" (that's true)
I believe in G-O-D (ayy)
Don't believe in T-H-O-T
She keep playing me dumb (play me)
I'ma play her for fun (uh-huh)
Y'all don't really know my mental
Lemme give you the picture like stencil
Falling out, in a drought
No flow, rain wasn't pouring down (pouring down)
See, that pain was all around
See, my mode was kinda lounged
Didn't know which-which way to turn
Flow was cool but I still felt burnt
Energy up, you can feel my surge
I'ma kill everything like this purge (ayy)
Let's just get this straight for a second, I'ma work
Even if I don't get paid for progression, I'ma get it (get it)
Everything that I do is electric
I'ma keep it in a motion, keep it moving like kinetic, ayy (yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)
Put this shit in a frame, better know I don't blame
Everything that I say, man I seen you deflate
Let me elevate, this ain't a prank
Have you walkin' on a plank, la-la-la-la-la, like
Both hands together, God, let me pray (now let me pray)
Uh, I've been going right, right around, call that relay (Masked Wolf)
Pass the baton, back and I'm on
Swimming in the pool, Kendrick Lamar, uh
Want a piece of this, a piece of mine, my peace a sign
Can you please read between the lines?
My rhyme's inclined to break your spine
They say that I'm so fine
You could never match my grind
Please do not, not waste my time
What you know about rollin' down in the deep?
When your brain goes numb, you can call that mental freeze
When these people talk too much, put that shit in slow motion, yeah
I feel like an astronaut in the ocean, ayy
What you know about rollin' down in the deep?
When your brain goes numb, you can call that mental freeze
When these people talk too much, put that shit in slow motion, yeah
I feel like an astronaut in the ocean.
What’s the worst part of being a pedophile?
Getting the blood out of your clown suit.
Antisocial
What's worse than a failed suicide, you ask?
I fail suicide because you forgot to do the dishes and your parents come after you and they're the ones to kill you, not yourself.
A pedophile and a little boy are walking into the woods late at night. The little boy says, "I'm scared." The pedophile says, "You think you're scared? I have to walk back alone!"
Mom: Daddy, stop!
Me: No!
Mom: Ok, I just wanted you to do it like your father.
Friend texting fat boy: I know you're on the group chat. I can see you looking at my texts.
Me: I can only see fat.
Sometimes I wish I could use my school scissors on my heart.
But apparently there is something in your heart, so I already have scissors in my heart.
Your hairline is so far back that it killed the dinosaurs.
Are you Shane Dawson?
Because I can be your pussy.
I bet your hairline goes inside your private part, and your girlfriend can’t even touch it.
Why'd I cum all over your mummy's panties? 'Cause she's hot af.
LOLOLOOLOLLOL
Yesterday I saw an orphan walking down the street. I asked him if he was ok. He said no, so I asked him if he needed help. And he said yes, so I let him in my car and said, "Don't worry, you'll be home with your parents soon." He said my parents died. I said I know.
A baby skunk's mother gets hit by a car, so the baby skunk doesn't know what he is.
So the baby skunk walks up to a baby bunny and asks, "What are you?" The baby bunny replies, "Well, I'm a baby bunny. What are you?" The baby skunk says, "Well, I don't know, am I a baby bunny too?"
The baby bunny says, "No, you're not a baby bunny." So the baby skunk asks, "Well, what am I then?"
The baby bunny replies, "Well, you're not exactly blank and you're not exactly white, so you must be Mexican."
Two whales went to a bar.
The first whale said, "oooooooohhhhhh." The second whale said, "Greg, I think you're drunk, let's go home."
Christopher Walkin: "This is a literal universal remote! It actually controls your life! You can pause, you can rewi-"
Me: power button.
Does anyone have an Xbox One? My gamertag is Chalkyfrog11. Add me and comment on this post telling me your gamertag.
Your face was so ugly, you got adopted by a poop!