You jokes

Hey girl, are you osteoporosis, because you're giving me a "bone" condition.

What do you get when you get yourself a deer with no eyes?

You get no-eye-deer.

Friend: Why did you touch me?

Me: That guy in the corner with no hair, glasses, really nice, white button up shirt, that drives a white van slow by school zones told me to and he would give me hard candy.

These are bee puns.🐝

I BEElieve you are eager to hear!🐝

I love to BEE a little 9 years old writing on this page.🐝

(Last one) I want to BEEcome a BEE. ;-; I kid... Like this now and please Subscribe to Kelly Qin on YouTube and she is my mom and she has a bake channel!

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?

It depends on how hard you throw them. 😈😈

Why can't you fool an aborted fetus?

Because it wasn't born yesterday.

Teacher makes 1 kid recite the ABCs and the other count to 10.

Teacher: You can kill 2 birds with 1 stone.

Little Johnny goes home and throws a rock at two birds. One dies. He gives his dad a concussion from the rock hitting his head.

Johnny at school: You can kill a bird and give a man a concussion.

It's funny dating someone smarter than you. My girlfriend knows how to push my buttons but never takes into account what a dick I can be if need be. Let me explain. Say, for example, she calls me retarded, I remind her that she's dating me.

One time my friend nutted into my bag of trail mix.

I guess you could say I fucking ate a different kind of nut.

My eggcellent egg yolks crack everyone up.

If you don't like them, you're just hard boiled.

What do you call a white kid at the back of class?

A school shooter.

What do you call people who jumped in the dam?

A dam fool.

How do you know when Kobe Bryant is famous?

His face was chiseled in a mountain.

Don't be sad if you miss a shot when you yell "Kobe." He didn't make it either.

You know why pedophiles get away with molesting children?

Because who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.

Did you hear about the emo kid that tried to high-five a tree? It left him hanging.

Are you my homework because I’m supposed to be doing you right now, but I’m not.

How do you name a Chinese kid?

Throw a frying pan on their head, "Ching Chong!"

Roses are red, violets are blue, If I slapped you, that’d be animal abuse.

You're so poor, even the store didn't let you buy anything free.