What does the door say to the doorbell?
The door said: "You dingus!"
You Jokes
My friend playing truth or dare asked me: "Dare".
My friends: "I dare you to go home."
What's the difference between a blowjob and cough syrup?
They can both give you relief and make you gag at the same time.
You know boys have balls. Girls have balls, too.
POV: You accidentally get H in your IV drip.
Just something wholesome to help you recover from whatever you just saw.
When an emo asks you to hang out under a tree...
Dad: Johnny, Johnny?
Johnny: Yes, Papa.
Dad: Getting women?
Johnny: Yes, Papa.
Dad: Telling lies?
Johnny: No, Papa.
Dad: Well, you're 100% lying because you get NO WOMEN!
If you drop an emo and a piece of paper out of a tree, you know what will hit the floor first? The paper, because the rope will stop the emo.
What do you call a dad without a dad joke?
Dead.
Hey baba girl, I have balls, you know.
What do you call a bored robot?
A “sigh”-borg.
Why can't an orphan play baseball? They don't know where home is.
Maybe you should go on eBay to see if they have a life for sale.
A goose with no beak, and you eat?
Goose beak salad, file! :)
Q: What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill?
A: A mud slide.
I photo bombed someone's selfie, and then they yelled, "Why would you do that? I was trying to take a family photo!"
Why can't you get water in the North Pole?
Because there is no well.
Hi, how are you?
Would you like some wine with those French cries?
Hey I have a joke for you.
My life hahah. I wanna die.
