You jokes
What do you call a white person from Africa?
Albino.
What do you call a 96-year-old who can still masturbate?
Miracle Whip.
What do you call the inside of the ISS toilet?
Cosmic Brownies.
I was watching TV with my brother, and a diabetes commercial came on saying, "I have type one diabetes, and I manage it well."
My brother said, "You want a cookie?"
I love you, Explain Bear. Please bear my children.
How do you find a black person in the dark without a flashlight?
Tell them a joke to make them smile.
Why is pounding your mom like playing video games?
Because once you start, you just can’t stop until you win!
Boy goes to Confession.
Boy: "What are you doing, Father?"
Priest: "It's called masturbation, and soon you will be doing it."
Boy: "Why do you say that, Father?"
Priest: "'Cause my hand is getting tired!"
-not my joke
"Did you hear about the worst zoo in the world? It only had one dog in it. It was a Shih Tzu."
You're so wonderful that Wonderland booked tickets to meet you!
Wanna go to suicide school, then time travel to Hitler's bunker and ask him to teach you?
What did mommy spider say to baby spider?
You spend too much time on the web.
Do you know why there are no pharmacies and pharmacists in Africa?
Because you can't take pills on an empty stomach!
A doctor walks into a room with a dying patient and tells him, "I'm sorry, but you only have 10 left."
The patient asks him, "Ten what, Doc? Hours? Days? Weeks?"
The doctor calmly looks at him and says, "Nine."
Why are disabled people screwed?
Because you can't run or hide!
How do you get a party started in Africa?
You put a slice of bread on the ceiling and everyone will be jumping.
Yo hairline so far back that you need a magnifying glass to see it.
Man: Doctor, where are you taking me?
Doctor: To the morgue.
Man: But I’m not dead yet.
Doctor: Are we there yet?
I told my mom I'm happy and she said: "I didn't know you were gay."
Kid #1: You're adopted.
Kid #2: At least they wanted me.
Kid #1: Did your real parents want you?