You jokes
Women be like men should pay for first dates, then get mad when you do...
You know how all zodiacs have hairstyles... well not Cancers.
Popular girl: Sorry I'm late.
Teacher: Why are you late!
Girl: I need my beauty sleep.
Nerd: Well, you might need to hibernate because you ain't pretty.
My girlfriend asked me whether I was having sex behind her back, and I replied, "Yes, who did you think it was?"
A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, "I slept with a Puerto Rican!"
Then the blonde replies, "OMG, you dirty little slut! How many is a Puerto Rican?"
What do you call a cat that walks slowly?
CATerpillar
How many orphans can you fit in a bag of chips?
One, if the bag is family size.
Why can't you eat cereal?
Because your dad never came back from getting the milk!
What do you call California during a forest fire?
Completely normal.
Hey Gwen, listen, I know you're on this app, fake or not. I love you either way. Please find this faker and finish her off for what she's done, real Gwen.
*You're a real best Gwen*
Are you a plane? Because I wanna be in control of you for a few hours.
When you go to a baseball game and they say, "Heads up!" and you put your head up, and the ball hits you in the head.
If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart, I'd be broke.
You should know it's important to wash your sex toys. That's why priests invented baptism.
What do a penis and a Rubik's Cube have in common? The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
What do you call it when a man gets high in Panera Bread?
Panera sped.
What kills you?
Suicide.
They say we have a primal sense, that we can just feel when someone is watching us.
It’s been a few weeks, and it's clear that you do not have that sense.
You shouldn't joke about 9/11. My grampa died on 9/11. He was the best pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.
Your mom is so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he asked your mom to move out of the way.