You jokes
What do you call a monkey in a minefield?
A baboom.
If you say "slay" in my comments I will follow all of you lmao who are signed in.
The double slit experiment shows light particles are a wave that assemble in your presence. And you didn't even have to say a word!
What do you call a fish without eyes?
A fsh.
If at first you donβt succeed... then skydiving definitely isnβt for you.
Wait a damn minute
I saw a kid sitting on the curb and I asked him, "Are you an orphan?"
He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?" "You're parents did."
"Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Who."
"Who who?"
"Why are you who-ing like an owl?"
Your mom and your dad.
What do you call a blonde in the freezer?
Her parents named her Jessica, so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.
When you're having a normal day at school, but then...
"All the other kids with the pumped up kicks"
Are you the Lusitania 'cause I wanna fire a torpedo into you?
School Bully: How's your girlfriend? Oh wait, you don't have any!
Me: How's your parents? Oh wait, you don't have any! *Continues to burn down orphanage*
"Do you know the difference between wallpaper and toilet paper?" Replies, "No." "Gross!"
What is the difference between a suicidal person and you? You're not dead.
You're so fat, when you fall, the sidewalk cracks.
Do you know what the equivalent to hell is these days?
1. Listening to your teacher.
2. Not having your phone/game/TV.
3. Not having nicotine.
Your mama is so funny looking that when the doctor called her, he said, "Never visit me again. I hope you die!"
Babe, I'm breaking up with you.
Why? I'm turning 18 tomorrow.
Okay, what do you call a dummy that writes a dumb writer?
Luckily for you, mirrors can't talk, and luckily for you, they can't laugh either.