You jokes
What do you call two Mexicans at a country restaurant? "Two beaners in a cracker house."
What do you call a dog magician?
A labracadabrador.
What do you call a chicken with no legs? Ground chicken 🤣💀🐔 Get WRAY'DDDDD!
You know your doctor is gay when he asks you to touch your toes, and then you feel a rub on your back and a tickle on your anus.
Me walking in to the office:
Principal: Tell me, what did you do?
Me: I told the special ed kid that the 4th story window was an end portal...
What you think about my sudoku record? Evil sudoku, no notes, no hints!
When you were late to school and your teacher called you tardy, she meant that in more ways than one.
"GWEN, can you help me? There's some person messing with me. There name is JADSA, something like that. Look for a joke named Jayden."
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Stranger.
Stranger who?
Stranger, why are you in my house masticating my apparent dead wife?
Some kid: Hey, did you know there's an orphanage down the street?!
Me: NO WAY! Wanna check it out?
Kid: NO, IT'S HAUNTED!!
Me: Haunted my ass, let's go!
Kid: Wait, isn't your house also haunted???
Me: Yea
What do you call a bear without teeth? A gummy bear hahaha.
Do you know what the F in Orphan stands for?
Family.
Bully: I wouldn't bother wasting my time on a shit person like you.
Me: At least I have a brain unlike you.
Bully: Well at least I have a mom unlike you.
Me: Well your mom is so fat that she got stuck in her car and started bleeding Nutella?
Bully: How would you know that?
Me: Because she told me herself.
Bully: How exactly?
Me: She's on the phone right now.
Phone: *High pitched animal noises*
Me: Told you so!
An old lady walks into an adoption center, and the lady that runs the business says, "Oh, haven’t seen you in a long time!"
You know, you should adopt a pet. So then you can feel the pain that your parents felt when they adopted you… wait… also the regret after.
Goats are like mushrooms.
If you shoot a cat, I'm scared of toasters.
How do you make a blow job OSHA compliant? You add a railing!
Me: Have you ever tried African food?
You: No.
Me: They haven't either.
How do you know that your sister is on her period?
Your dad's dick tastes weird.
My friend once said my opinion didn't matter. I said, "Why did you call me a female?"
What do you call a ball with no hair? A Mexican ball.