You jokes
You're gay if you see this.
What’s something you might say at sea, but not at your partner?
Land ho!
What do you call Jamieilyah when she is sleeping?
Sleeping Beauty.
I went up to a kid and asked, "Are you an orphan?" They said, "Yes, what gave me away?" I said, "Your parents."
How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?
Depends how hard you can throw them.
I saw this kid on the street wearing a rag. I said, "Are you an orphan?" He said, "What gave me away?" I said, "Your parents."
Why were you born?
Because I asked out your mom on accident.
How can you tell an Asian guy is awake?
You can never tell.
You're so bald, when you wear a turtleneck, you look like one!
An American mother has 3 children. The first child asked his mum: "Why is my sister called Crazy Horse and my brother Rushing Water?"
Mum: "Because those were the first thing I saw after i gave birth to them. Why are you asking all these questions, two dogs fucking?"
So I didn't want my mom going through my laptop, so I put a touch screen on it where you just have to tap the screen to unlock it. Jokes on her, she doesn't have any fingers.
You know what relationships and life? They both come to an end.
What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back.
A jumper cable walked into a bar. The bartender said, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything!"
A man saw a lady with big breasts. He asked, "Excuse me, can I bite your breasts for $1000?" She agrees, so they go to a secluded corner. She opens her blouse and the man puts his face in her breasts for 10 minutes. Eventually, the lady asks, "Aren't you gonna bite them?" He replies, "No, it's too expensive."
What do you call an anorexic bitch with a yeast infection?
Quarter pounder with cheese.
Son: Hey Dad, can I play Fortnite?
Dad: I don't know, do you want a girlfriend?
Look under...
Under where?
You just said underwear!
What do you call a flat emo?
A cutting board.
Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?